Must My Wannabe Content Creator Friend Stop Exploiting Me for Content?

The Prosecution: One Friend's Perspective

At times she films me while having a meal. It's jarring to spot myself on her Instagram – it feels like a jumpscare.

A close companion of 10 years, she, labels herself the “creativity monarch”. It can be amusing for a short while, but it strains our relationship.

She is an extrovert, there's a constant urge the need to record everything constantly. When we eat out, her motto is, “The camera eats first,” and takes photos with the flash on, which induces embarrassment. I don’t like it when other people see her posing or filming – I experience vicarious awkwardness. Another annoyance is because meals lose their warmth.

She isn’t exactly an online personality yet, but she is trying to be. She makes video blogs about city life, her daily routine, and her work as a stylist. Her content is good, I’ll give her that, but I prefer not to be dragged into it. On occasion I'm captured while I’m eating, or just accompanying her. I’ll see myself on her feed later, and it comes like a jumpscare: I might be bare-faced, an awkward face or be captured while eating. It’s uncomfortable.

Marielle also anticipates that I will to film her at inconvenient times. Often I'm in conversation to another person, or we’ll just be hanging out in the street. I feel like our friendship has transformed into me serving as her unpaid videographer. She has the means to hire someone if she wanted professional shots. Upon mentioning my unease about the situation, she dismissed it. She’s taken me to a couple of industry functions, which was nice, but that doesn't compensate for all the energy I invest helping her make content.

I appreciate that Marielle has supported me with my design career, but I resist our friendship to become merely a tally of exchanges. I don't believe she's insincere or inauthentic, but at times I feel that if recording starts, we will begin acting in a way that presents a favorable image for her channel.

She will say, “OK, look happy!” and film me smiling with another. It’s so silly. It's crucial her to recognize that our decade-long friendship still has limits. I love spending time with her, but I also want to enjoy it without being recorded, edited, or shared for an viewers. I am not a accessory for her Instagram.

The Defence: Marielle

I want Beth to see that the content we make together can get us a foot in the door.

I love shooting content. It’s not just a pastime; it’s part of who I am. Producing content and documenting experiences online allows me to express myself and connect with people in new ways.

I wouldn't label myself as a full influencer yet, but it’s smart to make money from your passions. I admire people on TikTok who execute that aesthetic of casual, DIY content creation.

Creating content is my interpretation of living actively: observing the nuances, posting them with an audience that appreciates the craft behind it. It's never my aim to make Beth uncomfortable. Bringing her to professional gatherings was my way of sharing opportunities, giving her a chance to witness exclusive moments that could benefit her career in design too. That isn't leverage, it’s just being realistic.

I would take her to such functions even if she refused to assist me, but I desire her to see the benefits the content we make together can get us: a foot in the door. I know not all people likes being filmed, but often unplanned moments is what makes content authentic. Appearing on video occasionally is part and parcel of being my companion. I would delete anything she asked, but she has never asked yet.

I don’t expect anyone to be my personal videographer, but friends support one another in small ways. I thought filming a short video now and then would be enjoyable for Beth. Innovation flourishes in collaboration, and having Beth around makes projects energetic and pleasurable. I don't compel her to take part in anything, and I’d never intentionally humiliate her. But creating content jointly sometimes is part of how I document our shared experiences.

I value our friendship profoundly and want to avoid making videos to come between us. I am ready to compromise: like asking before filming, and avoiding angles that might make her uncomfortable.

This isn’t about power, it's regarding expressing my perspective while still respecting hers. Obviously content creation is not a replacement for genuine friendship: it's merely part of how I live my life and I desire her to be included in a way that’s enjoyable for both of us.

The Jury: Public Sentiment

Should Marielle stop filming herself and her friend when they are out together?

There’s nothing more excruciating than having a friend point a camera at you. I get that it's her job, but I don’t make friends come to my work. Maybe she can find influencer friends to create content with. Given the uncertain future of AI, human connections are the only thing we have – don’t waste them!
A respondent, 25

When pursuing something professionally, you can’t ask your friends for assistance every time, even if they have done it before. While she enjoys shooting, that doesn’t mean all those around her is content. She must to respect Beth’s personal space.
Ankit, 26

She may enjoy producing videos and displaying her life online, but it’s not for everybody. It was kind she has helped Beth’s career, but she must to listen to what her friend desires.
Emma, 27

It seems like you care about each other, so hold on to that and make sure it’s the priority in your relationship. Foster some real experiences, where true emotions are stored, not digital scrapbooks. Even celebrities who seem to reveal their worlds actually have more privacy than it seems.
Sarah, 53

She seems to be neither present nor genuine when they're together – she's on the job. Each appears confused as to what’s reasonable. The answer lies not in trying to change one another, but in each setting clear boundaries around what feels acceptable to them and determining if there is an mutually agreeable compromise.
Barbara, 71

Now You Be the Judge

In an online poll: has she been exploiting their friendship?